PFDs and helmets, pass the laws and save us from ourselves

Recently Pennsylvania passed a law requiring Personal Flotation Devices to be worn at all times in any watercraft, even in paddle craft like canoes and kayaks.  I have to say I concur.  Somebody must have drowned that fell out of a canoe while paddling and that must be stopped.  Infringement on personal liberty? Hogwash!  There should no risk to living whatsoever and the government is darn well responsible for every single possibility.  (Just don’t take an ambassador job in Benghazi, apparently the government is less concerned about ambassadors.)  I think we should carry it further than just paddle craft though.  After all, I have heard that people have drowned while swimming so it’s no stretch to me that we should extend PFD wear to all swimmers.  I mean it’s one thing to have a possibility of falling in the water, but to deliberately get in the water without a PFD is sheer INSANITY!   Better to drag someone kicking and screaming in a wet bathing suit to jail than have the possibility of them drowning while swimming.

Also I hear in San Antonio the occasional person who has been drinking in one of the many bars along the River walk will fall into the river and drown.  Simple solution. They should pass a law that anyone drinking should wear a PFD. In fact, we have the Pearl River running through Jackson and at any time someone could stumble and fall into it, so I think the City Council should make a law requiring PFD’s at all times for anyone in downtown Jackson.  I’ve seen some of those council meeting and it’s pretty obvious those folks are drinking and they are planning a new “River walk” after all, so just go ahead and pass the law.  Think of the lives that will be saved and how fashionable those city council meetings will be with everyone wearing a nice bright orange PFD.

But it’s not like the City Council is not watching out for us because they are potentially going to pass an ordinance that you must wear a helmet while riding a bike or pay a $75 fine.  I must be the luckiest guy on Earth because I rode a bike from the time I was big enough to the time I bought my first car and I never had a head injury.  Wow, Incredible.  Actually none of my friends had head injuries either.  How lucky we all were.

But it was a lesson in life that demonstrated why someone must wear a helmet, at all times really.  When I was a kid I had a little Honda Cub 90 motorcycle and I dutifully wore a helmet because it was the law, but one  day a policeman really showed me the importance of a helmet.  You see I took my motorcycle up to one of the pressure wash places to wash it. Unfortunately the pressure wash got water in the points and it wouldn’t crank.  I was just a few blocks from home so I decided to just push the bike home.  It was of course the middle of the summer and 100 degrees out so I had the helmet strapped on the seat while I sweated bullets pushing the heavy motorcycle.  Occasionally I would get just a little hill and I would jump on the seat and coast the bike a little ways before I had to push again.  An incredibly nice and concerned police officer turned his lights on when he saw me do this without my helmet on.  Even though I was obviously pushing the motorcycle home because it would not crank and only coasting a few yards every now and then, the nice police officer gave my sixteen year old self a ticket for “riding a motorcycle without a helmet”.   I guess the law didn’t say anything about the motorcycle actually being under power.  Gee, I had no idea I was in such danger.  At the time I was just a youth and did not have the knowledge and wisdom of that nice police officer. Even my parents who had to pay the ticket did not understand his great wisdom.  Now that I am much older, I can see the incredible foresight and knowledge the police officer was demonstrating by applying the law as he saw fit instead of it’s intent.  Yes, I can see that now, can”t you?

So we shouldn’t stop there.  Heck anybody can just fall down at any time. The darn cat almost tripped me just the other day.  Heck I could have fallen in the Pearl or hit my head on some stupid art work the city has paid for with my taxes, like a concrete catfish or something. So we should have a law where everyone should wear a PFD and a helmet at all times.  That way if one should fall down or fall in the water, they will be just fine. I mean those city council folks really know how to look out for us.  I mean other than those pesky letters I get from the city about Ecoli in the water which is not safe to drink and their pumping untreated effluent into a river I would like to catch fish in.  No, no, I am glad to see them taking on important issues like bike helmet ordinances.  Save us from our own poor judgement and force us under threat of citation to do what many do on their own and others might not want to do because maybe they are not an “extreme biker” and don’t ride but occasionally for the fun of it.  If you don’t believe they are taking care of business just go down there and watch a meeting sometime, and enjoy a cocktail from wherever they must be getting them.  Oh and from what I have seen of those meetings, you might really need a helmet… BTW: The helmet ordinance issue has been moved to the December 11 agenda for vote at 10:00.  Wear your helmet and PFD for safety.